Joffe’s ‘Dead To Me,’ Week 3: No Love For The Cougars

Sep 18, 2018 2:24 PM EDT
  • Thanks to Akron, Joffe won her first "big dog" bet last week.
  • She could have won two bets, but her abhorrence of BYU compelled her not to take the Cougars against Wisconsin.

FINALLY! I got a winner!!!

Thanks to the Akron Zips I cashed my first “big dog” bet of the year. It took three weeks and 103 bets, but DAMN IT I WON ONE! Thank you, Northwestern!

I now have a 1-101-1 record (yes, I am very much down money,) but who cares? It was fun to dream. This is my lottery.

So who then is on my “Dead To Me” list, you ask? Well … let’s talk about the biggest upset of the weekend: BYU knocking off formerly No. 4, now No. 18, Wisconsin.

And then let’s talk about who specifically DID NOT take that bet. … ya girl right here.

You see, back in December 2008 my Arizona Wildcats went to the Las Vegas Bowl to play BYU and so did I. There had been a UA basketball game against UNLV earlier in the day so to say we pre-partied would be an understatement. (We party-partied.)

We won the bowl game and although I only vaguely remember the victory, I vividly remember leaving.

I was lagging behind everyone because in addition to being the shortest in my group of friends, I also wore wedges to the game (yeah, I’m THAT girl). So when I tripped and fell in my drunken stupor, my friends turned around, saw me on the ground, and laughed their asses off.

They just stood there laughing while these lovely BYU fans came to make sure I was OK and help me up. I remember thinking how nice they were despite us just beating them.

Fast forward to a few weeks ago when my Wildcats got taken to the woodshed by those very same BYU Cougars. They played dirty, and this led me to go on a rampage of sorts. In short, I decided to re-hate the Provo …

Which lead to BYU fans coming into my mentions to tell me:

So look, I’m not a BYU fan. But even I can look past those emotions to take a big dog, right? Well, no.

I was so irritated that I SPECIFICALLY passed up that ONE AND ONLY big dog because I couldn’t stomach the idea of having to “maybe” root for BYU. Well, touché, Cougars. You sure showed me.

The absurd amount of superlatives I was throwing at my Wisconsin friends about their team before the game was almost embarrassing considering I loathe them, too (still bitter about them beating us in basketball), so in a small way I almost feel like the loss, in a reverse-jinx sense, is on me.

So yeah, I let emotions get in the way, but since I’ve now been screwed by BYU TWICE in a month, there is no question that the Cougars are absolutely DEAD TO ME.

Does this mean I’m going to pass up another bet should they emerge again as big dogs? Sure does. Them’s the rules…

Credit:

Sep 15, 2018; Madison, WI, USA; BYU Cougars defensive back Malik Moore (12) and defensive back Isaiah Herron (10) celebrate following a game against the Wisconsin Badgers at Camp Randall Stadium. Mandatory Credit: Jeff Hanisch-USA TODAY Sports

Follow Lauren Joffe on Twitter
@thespinzone

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OPEN
CURR
# BETS
PSU
RUTG
48.5
+26
50.5
+28
ARK
MSST
45.5
-18.5
47
-21.5
CIT
BAMA
60.5
-51
62.5
-52
OSU
MD
58
+17.5
58.5
+14
NW
MINN
51
+3.5
47.5
-2.5
IDHO
FLA
59
-39.5
59
-40
MTSU
UK
45
-13
46.5
-16.5
UTAH
COLO
48.5
+7
47
+7.5
USU
CSU
68
+26
66.5
+28.5
SYR
ND
62.5
-10
64.5
-10.5
BC
FSU
49.5
+1
48.5
PK
WVU
OKST
69.5
+5
74
+6.5
MASS
UGA
62
-44
66.5
-41
IND
MICH
53
-27.5
55
-28.5
ORST
WASH
57.5
-31
58
-33.5
DUKE
CLEM
58
-27
58.5
-28.5
RICE
LSU
51
-44
52
-42.5
KU
OKLA
68
-34.5
70.5
-34.5
CIN
UCF
59.5
-8
61
-7
ISU
TEX
51
-3
48
-2.5
ARIZ
WSU
60.5
-10
62
-10.5